Sunday, May 5, 2013

Breaking down the Stigma of a Bully...

Bullying seems to be the norm these days. Its in the news pretty much once a week. The stories of children bullied so bad, they don't want to go back to school or they have to change schools to get away from it or the stories of the young taking their lives because they just can't live through any more torment. What does that say about the generation we are leaving this world when we pass on?

Bullying has been around for ages. The art of picking on the weak. We see it our history. Racism.Discrimination. We see it everywhere. Especially in our Children.

There has always been this need to fit in or be part of the "Cool" gang. But when you look at it, What is a Bully? Is it someone that thinks picking on a person is appropriate to make themselves feel good? Yes. A bully is a person who is insecure about themselves. A person that has to belittle someone else in order to make themselves feel better. Whether it be a jealous thing or something that this person lacks in personality or a physical attribute. But what ever it is, a Bully has something they are insecure about.Is it right? No.

It saddens me in this generation to come just how cruel people can be. I look at the one of the most  prominent media cases. Shamefully from my own hometown. Rehtaeh Parsons. A girl that took her own life, after something horrific happened to her. But people instead of being compassionate, bullied this girl till she couldn't take it anymore. She killed herself. What does that say about the kids that thought this was ok? What does it say about the Parents of these kids?When it comes to children, they learn by example. So if you have a parent that isn't open minded and doesn't except that others are different, then the vast majority of those children are going to look at people and think its ok to pick on the short comings of others.

Its not just children as well that are affected. Adults too. You see it in the difference of opinions. Attacking someone because they simply do things differently from you. Or that they think differently. Or that they live a different lifestyle than you. Ignorance and Insecurity.

We all have our own personal experiences with a bully. Either being one or being the victim of one. Most people are the victim of ones. Personally, I was the victim for many years. I was a freckled Face kid, with a really bad over bite, who learned differently from the rest. My biggest fault was I was too nice to people. I got taken advantage a lot in school. People I thought were friends, weren't. Played horrible tricks on me and thought it was funny when I was upset about it. What is really sad, is that I see the same thing happening to my children. My eldest. The kid with the big heart. I see people try and take advantage of him. I see the pain in that child's eyes, when his picked on for being small. Every morning I always tell him to surround yourself with people who make you happy. Who lift you up, instead of bring you down. One thing he does have, that I didn't is the courage to say " No, this is not ok"

My biggest fear will come with my other two children. Who do see the world differently. That will not understand why someone is making fun of their uniqueness. I know children can be cruel. I stress that I love them for who they are. How they treat people shows the world that they are doing something right. When it comes to bullying the Special Needs, the main reason is Ignorance. The inability to learn and educate one's self.

I wish the world would change. I wish that for my children's sake, they will not have a world of ignorance and hate to grow up in. I think sometimes that is wishful thinking. The whole celebrate the uniqueness of others. One thing I can teach my children is that there is always people who love them for who they are. People that are going to accept them for who they are. And to have the Mentality of " Hey, I am a good person, if that other person can't see that, their problem, their loss"